Have I lost all sense of judgement?
Have I just been at this online dating way too long?
Will I end up like Margot Kidder?…
Single, disoriented and mumbling incoherently in a wood pile?
Yesterday I was dissed by a Canadian homeboy I have had an email exchange with for almost a month. Go figure, one of whom I THOUGHT was one of the coolest, most easy going guys I never met. The Lumberjack-Surfer, an ‘Outdoorsman’ no less (and a surfer). He had mentioned initially during one of our first conversations that he was striving for the near future to live a sustainable rural lifestyle which included: Solar power, living off the land, and fishing. However he topped it off with the dirty ‘H’ word. I mentioned I wasn’t big on hunting, even though my father was a hunter (and also both grandparents back in the day). In response The LS essentially came back all chilled with: “Yeah sure, whatever, I can take it or leave it.” Of course that was until he mentioned feeling a little guilty over going on a surfing holiday instead of more practical purchases ie. truck parts and a rifle a few days ago.
CM: “You deserve a holiday after all those hours you put in, enjoy! You may already know what I would say about the rifle deal. ie. Why cause suffering and kill a healthy, peaceful creature?… it’s such an unfair advantage… it’s not a sport!…. Could you kill it after you looked in it’s eyes from 2 feet away?… but that’s just me. I was 9 years old when I started thinking this way and starting tripping my brother’s snare wire after I saw my father kill a live rabbit by hitting it over the head with the dull side of an axe after I begged him to set it free. I got really affected from that. Sorry, I’m quasi hard-core. But don’t worry I wouldn’t spray paint your shoes or picket outside your house or anything. LOL! “
I tried to be all cool and down play it somewhat. Or maybe I didn’t. (With my own father I can barely tolerate it.) But fact of the matter is it’s something I feel is really wrong. We are not indigenous people running around in buckskins in the brutal Canadian Wilderness wearing moccasins, chasing our next meal on foot, and fighting for survival. We have indoor plumbing, live in insulated heated homes, and have access to 24-hour supermarkets, and fast-food home-delivery. Unless those animals can be provided with opposable thumbs, guns and ammo, I feel the whole modern concept of hunting is bullshit and if I had to see my partner walking into the home we share, holding dead anything, or with some animal carcass covered in blood and slumped in the back of a pick-up truck parked in our driveway, and knowing he was responsible… Yours truly would seriously come unglued.
In a momentary loss of sanity - I felt bad about what I had written, because after I got his response that included: “Being worlds apart, and coming form the North” – I knew it was a blow off. Only a few days before he was calling me giving me compliments and calling me cute, hot etc.
This time it was ME getting rejected…
Hey wait! I am from the North too!
(So is every Canadian!)
So f’cking what?!
In my own defense I wasn’t trying to take a holier-than-thou stance, I have never claimed to be a perfect vegetarian, vegan or hardcore activist for animal rights, and I try not to engage in selective compassion. It simply pains me deeply to see any living creature suffer and/or die needlessly at the hands of ignorant, apathetic human beings. Any small contributions I make by my support or non-support of certain issues, and boycotting most animal goods – are at least something, and just that – a small contribution.
After just reading Marry Him: The Case For Settling for Mr. Good Enough and again re-assessing (scaling down) my already reasonable criteria for potential partners, I had to ask myself… “Could I really flex on my ideals/beliefs, and accept this and be in a relationship with someone who would cause suffering or death to a living creature?”
The real answer? NO…
So go ahead and shoot me for being honest.