There they go again…
A: You have a date in 2 hours.
D: And? … What’s your point?
A: You need to behave yourself.
D: Why do you always have to be a downer?
A: Do we REALLY have to have this conversation? Shall I mention Roberto – the sexual tape-worm? Mr. Superior to everyone Clark Kent? Or how about we raise the dead ie. Viagra-popping Running Man with his ‘altre amiche’, The Virgin that never gave you ONE orgasm, The smelly Farm-Stay Guy from the east who barely realized you were present during said act? Or how about Stalker-ex – the reigning king of all douche-bags?
D: Ok. Point taken, enough already.
A: Here are the the Rules: No debauchery! No alcohol! No pot smoking! NO SEX – this includes blow jobs.
D: NO FUN! He’s already built this thing up from an anthill to the Taj Mahal. You realize he is going to be all over me? He’s all but said this via text – respectfully and quite poetically I might add.
A: What if this one is a gem? Wouldn’t it be worth this tiny investment to hold off a little and NOT present yourself as an up-for-anything interlude for any hot dude trying to get his rocks off? If he’s not a gem, he’s just another notch on the bedpost. What sort of trophy is that? Remember what Deni said about Italian men and the ‘Madonna-Whore Complex?’ “Do you really want to play the latter for the typical Italian douche-bag?”
So… Put that libido on ice!
D: UFFF! Well then, excuse me – I guess I had better be off to prepare shouldn’t I?