Talk is cheap. Now go wash your hands and bedsheets from last weekend.

I’ll be hard pressed to get duped again.

Here, have a glass of f’ck you.

My gut is/was trying to tell me something. It’s still not clear, however  despite our most recent conversation (below) – I had a feeling something was up with Atlas. Last weekend he told me he was leaving for Milan on Monday to place one of the rescue dogs in a new home. But I felt a reluctance, I asked him a few simple questions via text conversation and he was evasive,  there was something he wasn’t telling me and he wasn’t about to come clean with whatever it was he was hiding. Last week he had asked me amongst all his profound text declarations, if I was seeing anyone, I said “no” and he had concurred the same. Whether he was spending extra days there to spend time with someone else or using the money from the rescue donations  to take an extended vacation… (or both) who knows?

Granted he’s not my boyfriend…
But nonetheless I don’t like it when people don’t tell me the whole truth.
The conversation below left a bad taste in my mouth:

A: Milan is boring.

CM: That is because I am not there to make trouble.

A: What trouble?

CM: Harassing too-thin supermodels with slices of cake and stealing police cars.

A:What about me?

CM: You want me to harass you with a slice of cake?

A: You can harass me with your body and touch.

CM: In Public? How scandalous! LOL! In reality you must come back to take advantage of a gift like that. But why are you still there?

(no answer)

CM: You don’t want to say?

A: I have to check on the dogs I placed in adoptions.

(An odd answer – he said he was only taking one dog there. His rescue is so small how could he have placed so many previous adoptions in Milan that could warrant almost a week’s stay? He is a volunteer, so where is the money coming from? Donations? Plus the fact he says the current population of the shelter is very dependent on his care and being there every day? How can he stay away that long if this is so?)


A: Come here, we can make love.

Sorry, but am I being overly sensitive felling like a piece of meat because this guy is bored and is telling me I should go there and have sex with him,
(in essence) so he won’t be? (And after I told him I wasn’t ready.)

CM: You shouldn’t think so casually about it, and of me. I don’t go with everyone, and I don’t let everyone inside my body.

A: I think nothing of you.

CM: You should go back and read your last text and think about it.

(no answer in 24 hours)

CM: I’m not angry. If this is the way you want to close a friendship, ok, as you like. What a pity.

A: No. Not closing our friendship. I am only talking less.

CM: I understand and it’s totally fine, but you dropped that line on me, and then silence. That was bad. Like I said, as you like.

A: You don’t like the things I say. I talk very little as not to bother you. We are still friends, Cakes.

Giving him the benefit of the doubt, I  tried to call him and tell him in a good way it’s easy to get signals crossed via text, and clarify the impression I got. I heard him answer the phone briefly, noise in the back ground, then he hung up, I tried calling once more and no answer.

OK. Loud and clear. You are full of it, and I am so done here. 

From me AND my dogs.
(If they could do this with their paws – they totally would)

C: I tried to call you, just wanted to say Hi and tell you it’s not exactly how you see it, and have a nice talk. You hung up the phone. I’m not going to bother you anymore.

I can’t f’cking believe this.

Some people should stay with the dogs…
and far from any interpersonal HUMAN relationships.

However on a lighter note and and EPIC sense of timing … I just got an all-expenses paid OFFER to travel up north for a weekend to hang out with all 6ft 4 inches of  ‘Corporal Bad-Ass.’

Will I go? Maybe.
(He has a guestroom.)

Not a bad runner-up, I must say.


About Cakes McCain

Aka. 'Oliver Twist with Furniture and Diamonds' Ex-pat, lunatic, survivor - A Bridget Jones/Shirley Valentine hybrid, epically flawed, neurotic literary ‘dirty apple’ with a penchant for broad shoulders, epic orgasms, & lazy Sunday mornings eating cake in bed. Almost always broken-hearted, forever analysing everything to a bloody pulp and eternally obessing over 'Pasta for One - The Manuscript' a chick-lit memoir about living single in fabulous Italy, while trying not to throw yourself in front of a speeding bus.
This entry was posted in boredom, casual sex, cheaters, dating, dating rejects, dogs, European men, hook-ups, humour, internet dating, Italian life, Italian men, Italy, Italy living, Lies, Life in Italy, Living in Italy, losers, love, MacDaddy, online dating, perverts, players, rebound, relationships, self examination, sex, single girl, social misfit, trust, Uncategorized, x-pat, x-pats and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Talk is cheap. Now go wash your hands and bedsheets from last weekend.

  1. A Dog With Fleas says:

    Ugh, sorry to hear that. What a tool!! Glad you tossed him on his ass!! I say give it a go with Corporal Bad-Ass!! Have fun whatever you decide!

  2. SillyG says:

    guest rooms are good 🙂

  3. Fantastic reply to the super douche. He sounds lije baaaad news. I like Cpl Bad Ass though! 😉

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