Sex, rice cakes, Jan Brady’s breasts, and other perversions…

It’s that time again… my personal faves of the search criterias that lead unsuspecting folk to my blog like the pied piper of debauchery, left to hang in my den of slack if only to glance over musings on Sleazy Italian MacDaddy creeps, their women with cardboard vaginas that love them, sleepover first dates and overall losers of the dating world.

The prize for Number one serch term is :

Rice cakes. Sorry to disappoint anyone seeking the  the holy grail and sublime flavour of edible Styrofoam, only to find my blog. I write one or 2 posts mentioning them and within a few months over 200 visitors.

The previous winner, now a runner up is the lovely Jan Brady and her breasts. I can only wonder if Eve Plumb is aware of how many perverts out there are seeking her likeness – probably photoshopping her face on naked teen bodies, and maturbating infront of their computers.

Not only are some of these classics, they open a whole new can of ridiculous banter.

Sorry to shatter your illusions on Italy folks… the grass ain’t always greener. (Some of you ended up here by accident, you twisted f’cks! But I still love you anyways so thanks for stopping by.)


About Cakes McCain

Aka. 'Oliver Twist with Furniture and Diamonds' Ex-pat, lunatic, survivor - A Bridget Jones/Shirley Valentine hybrid, epically flawed, neurotic literary ‘dirty apple’ with a penchant for broad shoulders, epic orgasms, & lazy Sunday mornings eating cake in bed. Almost always broken-hearted, forever analysing everything to a bloody pulp and eternally obessing over 'Pasta for One - The Manuscript' a chick-lit memoir about living single in fabulous Italy, while trying not to throw yourself in front of a speeding bus.
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