Functionally freaked and hitting the open road…

Back CameraI have been here almost 5 months, with the exception of the week I spent in Big City. I don’t work, I can barely write anymore, I’m bored, isolated and rarely leave the house more than twice a week – and not for more than 2 hours at a time. There is still a world out there I need to explore in order to find my own quasi-Utopia, but I still feel trapped in this ‘situation’ knowing the inevitable outcome, but not knowing WHEN… and waiting.  My father could live another month, or a year… who knows? I need a place to live, or to at least pick a town some where, on some continent – it’s a start.

Tracy (my life-guru), recently helped me put it in perspective…

“ANYTHING could happen, but if you wait around waiting for it…
‘anything’ could end up being nothing…and that’s more time of your life gone by…”

“So while you can control necessary stuff like travel arrangements and etc…getting too caught up in the future is a waste of mental power. Control what you CAN control…  And allow the rest to be an exciting unfolding surprise.  And also know that even if something does happen, you will be able to deal with it when it happens.”

It’s time to go…

I have sufficient cash, my passport, my dog’s EU Passport, my new backpack just arrived, and I’m buying a butane curling wand and a one-way ticket for Amsterdam –  leaving the middle of next month, then heading to The UK to spend a few days with Sir English, then go wherever else from there. I have few – almost NO plans, and this is really f’cking scary…


But it feels great.

About Cakes McCain

Aka. 'Oliver Twist with Furniture and Diamonds' Ex-pat, lunatic, survivor - A Bridget Jones/Shirley Valentine hybrid, epically flawed, neurotic literary ‘dirty apple’ with a penchant for broad shoulders, epic orgasms, & lazy Sunday mornings eating cake in bed. Almost always broken-hearted, forever analysing everything to a bloody pulp and eternally obessing over 'Pasta for One - The Manuscript' a chick-lit memoir about living single in fabulous Italy, while trying not to throw yourself in front of a speeding bus.
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12 Responses to Functionally freaked and hitting the open road…

  1. I would love to pick up an go and have freedom to travel and experience life the way you are. For now I will live vicariously through your fun and interesting blog. 😛

  2. go you! this is exciting. hey, i did sort of the same – had the absolute barebones structure of what i thought i might do for the first 3 months [ie, study the language] and then wing it from there. plans are a bit of an illusion anyway as they’re likely to change even when we’re somewhere nice and comfy. planfree = more open to adventure [and you’ll be writing like a fiend!]. good luck and i look forward to your updates 🙂

  3. airesse says:

    Brussels on the map?

  4. Diane C says:

    Your life guru is wise. It sounds like you are about to embark on a great adventure – sounds amazing! I just sent a request to see your Naples blog. I hope that is okay. I just wanted to see it because my husband and I have bought a house in Sicily for our impending retirement and we want to travel once we are there. Naples is a place in the south of Italy that we haven’t seen yet.

    • Cakes McCain says:

      I took that blog offline as there was no copyright to protect the photos. If you want to see more you can have a look at my Flickr account –
      I have not seen Sicily – other than in the Godfather! I looks wonderful though and as we know the best food is in the south! Cheers to you for having the guts NOT to move in one of the more northern more predictable expat colonies!
      cheers! xo CM

  5. storyofalice says:

    I love the sound of that, Cakes! Safe travels! xoxo

  6. Veggiewitch says:

    You have a beautiful life, Cakes, enjoy it! I will come with you in thought, so I punch out the meanies for/with you. ;0)

  7. SillyG says:

    Yes! So happy you have the ticket outta where you don’t want to be. oxox

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